However, if we feel that the person we are attracted to is not that into us, our unrequited love can sometimes trigger obsessive thoughts. Or even worse, if you are obsessing over a crush or ex-boyfriend / ex-girlfriend that you can’t be with, then these obsessive thoughts will prevent you from moving on in life. A lot of advice is don’t dwell on it, don’t think about it, don’t spend time thinking about it. I am not going to tell you to do that because I already know that you are going to dwell on it.

Once you understand how they feel, you will be able to let go. You must have had a life before you met this person. Go back and remember how it was and what you did with your time. Think of what made you happy and focus on those things.

Who said what shouldn’t have been said in that relationship? Who did the things that shouldn’t have been done in the relationship? That’s fine, you can take ownership of them, take responsibility.

But after some time, you might see each other again. In that case, treat them as an acquaintance and no more. Once you reach the point where you can wave to them on the street and keep walking without feeling a thing, you’ll know that you’re over them for good. Pamper yourself a little when you feel sad instead of letting the feeling overwhelm you. A coffee with a friend followed by a bubble bath and a night of binge-watching your favorite TV show sounds much better than obsessing over someone who’s out there living their life. While fantasizing about your future together can appear innocent, it just prevents you from moving on and keeps your feelings alive.

Then it will look at the potential causes for that obsession. Finally, it will provide plenty of effective tips on how to stop obsessing over someone. Dedicate yourself to activities, pursuits and goals that match who you are. Remember that timing is important and everyone is different. The person you’re with may have priorities in his or her life that you just don’t understand. People who change plans because of someone pushing them tend to end up really resenting that person.

As someone with an actual obsessive disorder i’d recommend diversifying your interest. That is; instead of messaging her pursue other women. Having all your eggs in one basket is a good way to feed obsession. Seeing multiple people can keep you from getting too attached to any one of them.

You’ll give yourself things to look forward to! Plus, those positive social interactions will boost your mood and self-esteem. If you don’t feel like you’re improving, there’s nothing wrong with seeking out professional help. Counselors and therapists are trained to help people heal and deal with problems.

The Normal Black Girl Taps Into Feminine Energy

These are all valid reasons to feel attracted to a woman, but obsession is rarely good. Left unaddressed, you stand to lose years, perhaps even decades, of your life to an unhealthy addiction. Want to learn how to stop obsessing over someone—or more specifically, the girl you like?

How to Stop Thinking About Your Girlfriend’s Past Relationships

In order to know how to stop being obsessive in a relationship, you first need to recognize the issue. By knowing how to spot the trouble signs of obsessive relationships early on, you’ll know when it’s time to take a step back. Chatting about something unrelated might take your mind off things. Message or call your best friend or another friend that’s available and see if they want to talk.

You call it fact-finding, but some might call it stalking. You’ve scoured all his social media accounts with a fine-tooth comb to get as much information about him and his personality as you can. You’ve changed your schedule so you can go to places he/she frequents in an attempt to accidentally bump into them.

This could explain your behavior in relationships and your need to hold onto people even if they are not showing you the same feelings in return. This could apply to a new crush or an ex-partner. You may want this person, but they do nothing positive in your life.

Experiment with mindful meditation and be open to the possibility of it helping you change your mindset. If the other person walks out on you during a fight, hangs up on you, or rejects you in any other way, you may have a very strong reaction. Any hint of rejection that you get from this person sends you into a panic, thinking that you might lose them forever.